Shibaricon Road Trip; Day 1
11:41 PST Location: deleted
I’m sending you this posting from somewhere in Utah. We are currently hiding out in a Quaker run safe house. Seems that the mere presence of this much orgasm inducing rope and 2 perverts such as Griffin and I have angered the powers that be to such an extent that they have dispatched the church police to apprehend us.

The plan for today was to make it a long and boring one. No planned stops and nobody to visit. Just get lots and lots of mile under the wheels of the Crimson Road Slut. That is too we got to central Montana.

Up to this point Montana was a delight, that is till we took the I-15 exit and headed south.
To say that we were in the middle of nowhere would be an understatement. In fact, this was where nowhere went to get away from it all. Cell phone reception? Forget it. I think out here they have not even heard of such devices and to suggest that you could communicate with someone via talking into a little plastic box would probably have gotten us burnt as witches.


Oh and did I mention that we had less than a 1/8th of a tank of gas left? Breaking down here would mean disaster.

As we nervously crossed the continental divide I kept scanning the road ahead for signs of a town, a truck stop, heck anything. Then we saw it. A signpost for a town called “Divide” with the icon of a gas pump next to it. Our sigh of relief was quickly replaced by shock as we pulled into the town known as “Divide”
Or should I say the single, automated gas pump in the middle of nowhere with a road marker next to it?

Now as a rampant fan of horror, this place looked bad. No it looked worse than bad, it looked like the perfect spot to be ambushed by radioactive, cannibal hillbillies.

“There has to be another place to get gas?” Griffin asked.
“If it is, we ain’t got enough to get us there. The tank is on E”

So he quickly pumped while I kept watch for any tell tale signs of inbred assassins or shambling figures on the horizon.

As we sped back onto the freeway I declared, “New rule. We always fill up the tank before it hits ½”

All told, today we logged 980 miles of pavement. Passed through 4 states (Even had sloppy seconds with Idaho) Drove over 4 mountain passes, a continental divide, said hello to the Governor of Montana, and drank 1 can of Rock Star.

Have no fear, our hosts tell us that they know of an underground railroad used by old porno smugglers that will lead us out of the state. All we need to do is follow the trail of old hustlers and used tissue paper to freedom