And now, a story problem

Monk is on a train traveling at 10 miles per hour. Leaving for Black Rose in less than 64 hours as well as supplying rope for Max’s upcoming partial suspension class this weekend, he needs to finish a great deal of rope. In order to go from being “Astoundingly, frighteningly and overwhelmingly fucking behind” to just “really fucking behind schedule” he needs to finish the ends of 70 pieces of rope today. Knowing that Monk takes an average of 4 minutes per end, how many hours of youtube.com will it take before he is done?

The Answer: 9 freaking hours. I’ve watched pretty much all of season 10 of South Park and a couple episodes of MST3K, but damnit they are done. Ah the glorious life of an international bondage rope mogul. Now if you will excuse me, I think I’ll go lie down, read some Agatha Christie, and see if some ice can do anything to reduce the swelling in my hands.