Weakest Kink, Week 3 Results
Sorry for the wiat, we had a techincal meltdown here and well, well you know things got behind scehulde. No worries, the results are up and well worth the wait.
Now if you don't mind I really gotta go to bed.
Weakest Kink, Week 3 Results
From the inbox:
I really should be at work right now...
Quick answers to some questions I get asked.
What is your favorite color?
Hunter S. Thompson Commits Suicide
The Weakest Kink: Week 2
About that contest... We JUST finished the big Oz order and now I need to get ready for a party. So I'm thinking that you will need to wait till tomorrow for those results. Sorry,.
The first contestant gets voted out of the duengon today, but first I need to get a few things done. Like dangle a cute girl at the shop, finish this huge order for the folks down under, negotaite something very cool that I can't tell you about (but trust me this is AWESOME!), recover from my night with Dancer AND take Tambo to the movies.
Winch Wench Wanted
“…it was twenty years ago today”
Monk: Hi sweetie. Can I help it if I’m in love with the sexiest, kilt wearin’ rope maker in the world? Nope, not in the least. –Your chewy-chocolate center
Ever wonder what three quarters of a mile of rope looked like?
The Weakest Kink, Week 1 results.
Now I know you are all waiting with baited breath for the results from this weeks challenge. No fears dear readers. All 6 contestants have completed their challenge! Dancer and I are just reviewing them now. We would have done it last night, but well… you know what happens when you mix nudity, rope, needles, and a mini propeller fan. Hmm maybe you don’t, but that is a story for another day.
Thursday Morning Quickie
Some Items Should Never Find Thier Way Into The Bedroom
A Day At The Abbey
1) Having a blacksmith for a neighbor who not only plays great music, but hammers steel in time to ‘40’s swing tunes
2) Trains rumble past not 5 feet from the windows.
3) Having neighbors whom; when you tell them that you make bondage rope, ask excitedly, “Cool! Can you show me some?”
4) Having these same neighbors look at one of our time-consuming hand process and then dash off to their shops to make a tool that will do it in a fraction of the time.
5) Boil kettles big enough to cook an entire human… or 1200 feet of rope at a time.
6) Free Wi-Fi access at the nearby coffee house, and they make a damn fine Americano too.
7) After they craftspeople leave at the end of the day, the rock bands come in to practice across the courtyard.
8) Listening to live music pour out of a dozen different practice spaces as you walk to the bathroom.
9) A motorcycle club has their clubhouse across the courtyard as well as a custom chopper shop is located around the corner.
10) New lunch destination, “The Georgetown King of Curry”, Griffin and I have a date to try it out on Wednesday.
I’m a hopeless romantic, You’re just hopeless!
The Weakest Kink Week1
It’s a good day to be named Monk
My Libido Demands It
Recently, over spicy Indian food, a fellow kinkster and I were discussing the ins and outs of this thing called “poly”. I was sharing with him my response to watching my dearest Tambo get tied up in public by someone other than me for the very first time. While we have been at this thing for a long time, this was the first time she had ever publicly bottomed to another guy while I watched on the sidelines, no less.
“Over all it was very cool, he was great and did a fantastic job, I knew she was in good hands but there were a few moments that were fucking tough to take,” I told him in between bites.
“Yeah, you kept it together pretty well there until that last bit.”
“That last bit” he was referring to was the point in the scene when Tambo, fully in rope headspace, made that noise. You know, that noise… that sound your lover makes when you know they are having a really good time. That sound you hope they only make for you.
“Yeah, that was a hard moment. Thankfully Dancer was there to distract me and hold my hand while I bit my lip and furrowed my brow.”
“I’m glad I’m not the only one who struggles with this, for a while I thought maybe I just was not wired for poly?”
“That, good sir, it horseshit.”
Poly is hard, hard work. You spend a lot of time experiencing what we like to call “FGO” or “FUCKING GROWTH OPPORTUNITES” Now this is not to say that poly is unattainable or that you should not do it. In fact I would say just the opposite. Poly, while a lot of work, is a very rich and rewarding lifestyle choice. However you must first understand that nobody is really “wired” for it. It is a choice you make and you must be willing to work at it.
I certainly do not have the magic bullet for how to do painless poly. I have however learned a few lessons along the way. If I could impart two lessons that I have learned in my near decade of being poly (in one form or another) it would be this.
First, embrace the fact that you are going to have “moments”, but realize that they are just that. Moments are temporary things. Sure, when you are experiencing them they suck, but they will pass. The hope here is that with practice these moments will fade and eventually become non-issues. Things that once sent me into moments of gut ripping insecurity now don’t really seem to phase me all that much. But that took time, patience and a loving partner who was willing to let me have those moments and not criticize or think I was less poly than I should be.
Second would be to not use the generic term of “jealousy” when describing the way you feel in that moment. Look deeper than just saying “I’m feeling jealous right now” and ask yourself to be more specific. Take this example, if I see my lover being intimate and making kissy face with another person I have moments of envy. You see, I know how good her attention feels and I’m envious that someone else is on the receiving end of it. Or like when watching your partner bottom to another, it is all about ego. The feeling that, “no, I’m the rock and roll rope top here…”
Moments of ego, moments of envy, moments of insecurity, and moments of fear we all have them. So admit that you too will have moments and that moments will pass. Also try to describe your moment in better terms; it makes communicating your feelings later oh so much easier.
I said before that I do not have all the answers, in fact nobody really does. Everyone who is poly struggles at times with it, but that is not to say that it is not worth the work. The emotional rewards, the amazing bonds of trust and respect you form with your partners, and quite frankly the fact that you can be richly and deeply in love with more than one person and that it is ok… well that is worth the work.