Wednesday, December 31, 2008

The Obligatory Year End Blog Post

Most would say that it is tradition, on this the last day of the year, to post a review of the past 365 days. A look back at what was good and bad in my world, to reflect upon what I have learned and where I have yet to do so.

Truth be told, I’m really happy with the past year.

Fucking delighted to be exact, in light of all the economic disasters that seem to keep just getting worse my little rope company keeps trucking along, growing and providing a nice income for us all.
Choosing to break the death march-road show-death march cycle and opt out of vending at conventions proved to be a successful one, allowing more focus to grown the company in a more stable, larger and prosperous business.
After coming out earlier this year as a sex worker, that aspect of my world has flourished and grown as well, thanks in no small part to having the most amazing and supportive partners in the world.
Even with all the crazy stresses and things I do to my body the doc says I’m in the best health of my life.
I’ve met some amazingly cool people, thrown some great scenes and had more than my fair share of crazy, hot, walking funny afterwards sex.

If I had one complaint it would be that I really need to buy a car. Commuting 365 days a year on a motorcycle can really suck at times.

So in short, wow what a year. Let’s do it again! Oh and somebody remind me to go car shopping soon.

Monday, December 29, 2008

Something hot on a cold, cold day.

Remember that all day photo shoot I did with Merrick Monroe back in, what was that July? I just got the proofs back and had to pull a couple hot ones out to share with you guys. There will be more, and video too, but for now enjoy some hot rope porn, courtesy of yours truly.

More to follow once my hands thaw our and fingers remember how to work properly. In the meantime big, big thanks to Merrick for letting me be so mean to her and looking so good the whole time.


Thursday, December 25, 2008

jason claims another one

jason claims another one
Originally uploaded by Mr Monk

movies on xms day, a tradition of tambo and I.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Well, its Christmas eve and I'm working in the Abbey. As much as it would be nice to call another snow day, we have lots of work still to do and frankly I think everyone on my crew would rather be doing something instead of staying cooped up at home going slightly mad. So we are here, for at least part of the day, I'm going against my own "no holiday music" rule and letting them play some heavy metal christmas tunes and there is whiskey for the coffee.

Last night, while waiting for my cold meds to kick in, my awesome video producer was showing me some of his latest work as well as some of the stuff he thinks we should adapt for future TwistedMonk videos. He's in love with Beyonce's new vid and thinks we could adapt the shooting technique for a very cool bondage video. I love his technical vision and if I can imagine it, he can probably shoot it or CGI it. Of course there is a worry, how well all this video stuff will age. I dare say I fear that one day, many years from now we will look back on this much like we look back on this gem from 1987, "Dancin Kim teaches you how to do The Thriller"

I'll leave you with this one, the riotously funny SNL short, "Jizz In My Pants"

Drive safe out there kids, it is still raining/snowing outside the Abbey today and even with the heaters on and extra layers of insulation, bitter cold today. Stay safe, stay warm and do something fun with someone you love.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Moving like there is molasses flowing thru my veins

I'm still here, can't believe I have not updated in several days. Guess I'm too distracted with staying warm, looking after snowed in loved ones and making sure my shop does not freeze solid. The x-mas rush was thankfully completed before the big snow dump happened, so that is a plus. Those that came in after the 11? We are filling them as fast as we can, all shipments of supplies are delayed due to the snow. Today marks the first day I have been back in my shop in what, 4 days? Five?

Need to thaw things out a bit, get the machines (and crew) back up and operating after the deep freeze.

More to follow.

Friday, December 19, 2008

stealing a page from matisse

stealing a page from matisse
Originally uploaded by Mr Monk

in a penthouse suite the size of my house about ready to go entertain a vip for the evening.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

the view from my back yard

the view from my back yard
Originally uploaded by Mr Monk

last night it was bare and cold, this morning covered in white. my pets are curled up in front of the heaters.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

In the trench, not much bandwidth to blog

I've got less than 4 days to get the last of these x-mas orders out the door and into the hands of my customers. The snow and freezing temperatures are not helping things, but we will fill all the orders placed before the cut off as well as do our best to fill as many as the post cut off orders too.

So pardon me while I devote my energies to making rope and keeping the Minion warm and motivated.

Friday, December 12, 2008

Porch Pastor sent this one along to me... and it made me shoot coffee out my nose.

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Thursday, December 11, 2008

Technical gremlins have been fixed, the new color is dry and looks stunning. A "bloody" red, with more maroon tones in it than our stock Crimson. Remember, profits from the sale of this rope will be dontated to MarriageEquality.Org

UPDATE 10:35am WE ARE NOW SOLD OUT. This marks both the largest color of the month color run we have ever made and the FASTEST sell out in history, 30minutes. Thank you to everyone who placed orders. We will be begin cutting and filling your orders in the order they were received.


Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Due to a mechanical failure at the Abbey, December's Color of the Month is not yet dry and therefore not ready for sale yet. I regret to inform everyone that I must postpone the sale for 24 hours so that I can assure I have correct stock on hand for what looks to be a fast sell out.

We will release the color for sale at 10am on Thursday December 11th.

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

Regarding December’s Color of the Month

Tomorrow, Wednesday December 10th, I will be releasing our next Color of the Month for sale.

As you may know, every month I create a small batch, limited edition color. This one of a kind color is offered up for sale, first come first served, and when it is sold out, it is sold out for good. Demand for these unique colors has been nothing sort of amazing, often selling out in a matter of hours, I do not advertise when the new color will be available till it is ready and only then to readers of my blog and twitter feed.

So why am I breaking with tradition and pre-announcing the new shade?

Two reasons really, first and most obvious would be that this is the holiday season and folks are looking for presents. Due to the rate at which the color of the month sells, we cut and process orders as they arrive in order to reduce the chance of overselling the shade. Most color of the month orders will be shipped with in 24hours. December 10th is the cut off day for placing a rope order for domestic delivery.

The other reason?

Well this rope is special; this rope will help bring change.

Of all the things I have done in my life so far, being married to Tambo is one of the things I am most proud of. Our 20+ years together have been nothing short of amazing and I could not do all I have done with out her unwavering support. I, I am a big fan of the institution of marriage and this is why it appalls me that in this, the 21st century, we would deny this basic civil right to others based on their sexual orientation. It angers me to know that groups, choosing to selectively clinging to Bronze Age ideas, would seek to not only refuse this right to consenting adults, but also work to further restrict the civil rights of those they deem as “immoral”.

Sure, I’m straight and am not directly impacted by such mindless and prejudice legislation as California’s Proposition 8, but to deny the civil rights of any group of consenting adults is to endanger the civil rights of us all. It is the responsibility of all of us who identify as “other”, to band together as one great and clear voice and say “No, this is not how my country treats its citizens”.

This is why I am proud to announce that TwistedMonk.Com will donate the profits from the sale of this shade to so that they can continue to fight so that all Americans, regardless of race, creed or sexual orientation are not denied their civil rights.

There you have it, tomorrow at 10am I’m releasing “equality”. An ox-blood red rope, a rope with a mission and a cause behind it. A rope that you can proudly give as a gift, even a gift to yourself, and know that you have taken part to bring about progress and defeat those would seek to deny the rights of others.

Remember, we are all in this together.

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Monday, December 08, 2008

Welcome to the start of Monk's wild week.

The next 7 days are going to be jam packed as we bust out holiday orders and try to keep our sanity though the liberal application of caffeine and pastry. Don't forget, the last day you can safely place a holiday order and expect domestic delivery before the 24th is WEDNESDAY THE 10th!

Before I refill my coffee and dive back into these orders I wanted to mention something really cool that happened to me yesterday. So Tambo and I are at the Bondage is the Point party last night, sitting back on the big sofa and just taking it all in. Chilling, chatting with friends and watching some of the really fantastic ropework that is Seattle become so well known for in action. At one point my other partner, Matisse, sits down next to me and the three of us just sat back and chatted. No real agenda, just the casual back and forth as they laughed at my bad jokes and swapped fashion horror stories.

Talk about the best seat in the house. Kicked back with two of the most beautiful women in the world and an utter lack of drama. I never did much rope that night, but for me it was just want I needed. To be with my two favorite people, to ask them for advice about things weighing on my brain and not having to stress over it getting "strange" as they both offered thier different viewpoints. I'd love to boast and say that it is all thanks to my awesome kung-fu powers of poly, but the truth of the matter is that I'm really, fantastically lucky to be loved by such cool women.

Ok, back to work.


Friday, December 05, 2008

For those of you attending Max's Rope Bondage 201 class this Sunday at CSPS. I feared that I would not have enough stock on hand to vend and fill all the orders we have, but thanks to some extra hard work by the Minion I'll have a LIMITED number of rope kits and books on hand to sell before the class.

Come early as stock is very limited, visa/mc accepted, class starts at 2:30

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Short 2 Minion Today and Low on Coffee

Dashing about the Abbey like the wild eyed madman out of some silent movie. Enjoy Jack Black playing Jesus Christ in "Prop 8, The Musical!"

See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die

Thursday, December 04, 2008

The horrors of porn
I like porn. Call it an affliction, an addiction or simply the primary purpose of the internet, but there is a whole lotta porn out there and I’ve seen more than most. A common trend in porn would be body art, I know what you are going to say tattoos are as old as civilization so this is not a new development, I agree, but since most porn focuses primarily on the “point of contact”, ie the wet, pink bits, as they thrust away more and more talent are opting to get tattoos on their hips, asses and even genitals in order to retain some level of uniquely identifying marks, lest they get lost in the sea of shaved wangs and oddly tanned taints.

Ok, so the businessman in me can respect this as another form of marketing, sort of solidifying one’s brand identity really. However I think it may have just been taken too far.

While randomly checking out porn while waiting for some coffee to brew I noticed something that, at first, caught me as oddly out of place. I’ve worked in porn, on the tech side of the camera, so I’m pretty aware of what goes into making two (or three or 12) people splashing about in each other’s bodily fluids look sexy. So when I noticed the female model sporting what at first glance looked to be…ahem… well how shall I put it, a stain on her pink bits? No, more of discolored ring around her asshole. I was naturally taken aback. Surely this site has the budget for some hand-wipes and a videographer with the brains to know that he will soon be shooting this girls bottom in hi-def so it would be in his best interest to make sure that he has a, shall we say tidy pallet from which to paint his jizz stained masterpiece.

No, no on second glance it was not a stain but rather a tattoo. Yes, dear readers a tattoo on that most taboo ring of muscle.

Like passing a highway fatality involving a bus full of crippled nuns colliding with a tanker truck carrying sulfuric acid, I had to stop and stare. What the hell would you posses you to get tattooed there?! Can you imagine that tattoo session? Can you say ouch? I don’t even want to think about the post ink healing process. 4 weeks of scabbing and itching anyone? How do you keep it sterile? Fuck that, how hell do you take a crap?! Gah! The mind reels. Sadly, or possibly thankfully, the series of images in question chose to opt against using the ULTRA zoom lens and show a close-up of said tattoo as it was taking on the business end of her co-star so I still have no idea exactly what she chose to have permanently etched upon the ring of her ass.

“Millions and millions served”, “What do you do with a B.A. in English?”, I secretly hope she took the nerd route and opted for the “One Ring…” line from Lord of the Rings.

See for yourself; don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Wednesday, December 03, 2008

The Shape of Things to Come

I twittered about this earlier, but it is now official. My awesome steel guy and I are going to offer up some of the one of a kind prototype suspension rings, suspension bars and other one of a kind steel toys up for auction. For those of you still looking for that perfect gift for the rope lover in your life, this is your chance to score them something really cool. Look for that to launch early next week.

Also next week, I am launching December's color of the month. Due to the rapid rate that the past 3 month's colors have sold out and in the spirit of the whole holiday thing, I am giving you all an unfair advantage. Look for the new color on December 10th.

December 10th is also important because it is the last day you can place an order for Christmas delivery. Quality rope takes time, don't wait till the last second to place your Christmas order.

Last, but not least, Matisse and I are headed back into the sound studio to record another block of podcasts. She has specifically asked to hear from my readers if they have any questions. So if you have a question about kink, poly, sex-work or even fashion shoot me an email and if we think we can do the question justice, we will answer it on the air.

Tuesday, December 02, 2008


As some of you may know, the powers that be seem to think that The Rocky Horror Picture Show needs to be remade. Yes, yes I agree this is just shy of lunacy and a crime against all that is right with this world. For most kinksters, discovering RHP was a touchstone moment. That point when you first realized that there were other people who, like you, viewed the world through a slightly tilted lens and you were not alone.

Now rather than begrudge the march of time, I say we embrace the change and take a hand in shaping our world. To that note I am going to take it upon myself to cast the remake. Here are my recommendations, Hollywood take note!

Brad and Janet: I’m at a loss on this one as I really do not make it a point to pay much attention to “Young Hollywood”, however it seems to me that it would make perverse sense to get someone from the Disney world who wants to shed their squeaky clean image and be taken finally as an “adult”. Maybe one of the Jonas Brothers? Hannah Montana perhaps? Not sure, somebody call Disney and have them pluck one or two from the vats they grow them out of and send em over to casting.

Dr. Scott: In a nod to Matisse on this one I’m gonna cast Christopher Walken. After seeing him cut a rug in the Weapon of Choice video I think he will do great. Besides who would not want to see him sporting a pair of silk stockings and heels?

Columbia: Pink. I can just see her sneering and tap-dancing away during the Time Warp and it makes my pants happy.

Magenta: Angelina Jolle? I’m not married to the idea, but her and Pink doing “toucha-toucha-touch me” sounds pretty smoking.

Riff-Raff: I say we just let Richard O’Brien have the roll again. He played the original, wrote the score and creepily still looks much the same 30 years later. If we can’t get him, Marilyn Manson would make a good understudy.

Eddie: Jack Black. No question.

The Monster: I’m unsure on this one. My original vote was for Daniel Craig, but my advisers say he is too old for the role and won’t appeal to the youth market. So this one is still undecided.

Dr. Frankfurter: While Tim Curry defined the role and gave cross dressers, would be glam rockers and gender queers the world over someone to aspire to, he is sadly too old now to refill those platform heels he once rocked so hard. At first the idea of Robert Downey Jr seemed a good one. He has the mojo and the chops and after the string of wins this year at the box office he could do film himself farting on a snare drum for 3 hours and we would all flock to see it.

However, as was just pointed out to me, Eddy Izzard would make one hell of a Frank.